The King of Retail
 | Average Customer Rating: Recommend Before realizing I could earn a substandard income as a writer, I ran a bike shop on Manhattan's Upper East Side. Ah, retail. If you've never had a job in retail you really are missing something. What you're missing is exhaustion, discontent, irritable bowel syndrome, bitterness, athletes' foot, free-floating rage, crotch rot, depression, chronic bedwetting, and a powerful urge to tear the eyelids off complete strangers. I was the King of Retail. And it was a good… Product details and pricing info |
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5 Customer Reviews Posted
- Hilarious, a bullseye.
- You don't have to have experience in retail to appreciate the humor in this laugh-out-loud story of frustration, rage, sadness, and despair. If you've worked, gone to school, or lived, you'll understand the angst Jarrett suffered. But Jarrett somehow manages to find the humor in everything (see his story "You were right"). For the reviewer who had trouble with the details, I'm afraid you missed the point. The details here combine to create a mood and a reality that makes the reader see, understand, identify with, and care about the character. Did I forget to mention how funny this is? I think Grant Jarrett is one of the funniest, most versatile writers around. Give it a shot.
- 2006-10-26, 3 of 3 people found this review helpful, Rated:
- In the Mood for Annoying OCD Drivel?
- Does anyone really need to know all the tiny, uninteresting details of another person's life? Surprisingly, quite a few Amazon Short readers have decided that this is the oeuvre to desire. I bought (2) of Jarrett's 'Shorts' to gauge what it means to be popular on Amazon Shorts and can state that I've discovered more entertainment in discarded lists in the parking lot of my grocery store,then in Jarrett's work.
I'll let his writing speak for itself:
"Once I decide what to wear there is little to assemble for my impending work day: a pen, my wallet, the keys to both the apartment and the shop, a few cans of Pepsi to recharge me when I run low and maybe something to read at lunchtime - an optimistic thought. So I pace aimlessly while the precious minutes dissolve."
Feeling your brain dissolve? Wondering why Amazon called this Literature? Good questions, but if you're the guy who wanted Howie Mandel to muse more about his OCD...then Amazon's found the writer for you. For the rest, if you're trolling for 'Lit' save your 49 cents. - 2006-10-22, 4 of 8 people found this review helpful, Rated:
- Jarrett pushes my "laugh button!"
- After reading Gas and Snack, I had to give this short a try. The author, Grant Jarrett, really has a sense of humor. And it seems he can find it anywhere ... even in a hellish job situation.
My very first job fresh out of high school was behind the jewelry counter at a Robinson-Schwenn department store in Ohio. I didn't work there long enough to encounter any problems, but that was in a gentler, kinder age when customers weren't so rushed, so I have no personal basis for comparison.
However, I do see the problem secondhand on a daily basis: at the grocery store, in the post office, in restaurants ... wherever. I see customers being extremely rude to clerks and waiters, and vice versa ... often to the point where they almost come to blows. I blame it on the fact that everyone in California is always in a rush; they work too hard, too long, etc.
Even though Jarrett's character is frustrated in his retail job, Jarrett manages to find the humor in it. A well-paced, well-plotted story. This author is really talented. I recommend all his short stories. - 2006-07-15, 2 of 3 people found this review helpful, Rated:
- Painfully Funny!
- I was all set to be offended with Mr. Jarrett's four letter words needlessly used at whim, but he won me over with them because those four letter words helped him describes EXACTLY how one feels and more importantly how one THINKS if you [are or have] ever worked in RETAIL.
He writes with a telling sign of his former life as a stand up comic, and makes the story something more then just another "b*tching and moaning" drama session. I really enjoyed his choice of words and his sense of humor, I wait anxiously now for his next venture in AmazonShorts. Great work!, Mr. Jarrett. - 2006-06-13, 3 of 3 people found this review helpful, Rated:
- Hell made hilarious
- Anyone who's had a job in retail or waited tables, anyone who's dealt with the public or simply experienced the existential panic that working at an unsatisfying job can ignite will relate to the tortured character in The King of Retail. This story, a mix of hilarity and despair, begins where the last morning dream ends and ends when the night's first dream begins. Very funny and pitch perfect. Another hit from Jarret.
- 2006-06-10, 3 of 4 people found this review helpful, Rated:
